Phyllis Diller quotes (American comedienne and actress, born 1917)
The question has been brought up in my mom's group-- "You can do anything for 15 minutes" is crazy because when you are doing anything with kids around-- you don't have 15 minutes! Not even 5 minutes, before the kids are getting into something. I've had days where they go behind me messing up everything I just cleaned- or all I can do is run behind them putting out their fires.
There are a few things I've learned while observing and working with my 7 children... and I can relate it to my college education in child development.
1-2's. You can give them a damp washcloth and just let them wipe anything that is near you as you clean. They just want to BE with you, and they love to imitate you. They'll love a little whisk broom and dust pan- they are uncoordinated so they'll be tossing debris around more than cleaning it, but they will be happy and near you. Just while I was helping my girls fold laundry, my 13 mo old niece came running to unfold the towels as fast I could fold them. I took the towel and placed it firmly on the ground in front of her, kept eye contact, and emphasized putting the towel THERE, and then I handed her a face cloth. She was perfectly happy with the face cloth and didn't touch the towels again.2-3's. These guys love to do the spray bottle (water only, they'll try to drink from it) and they're getting a bit more coordinated with sweeping. It still looks like they're making more mess than good, though. Their skills can be put to spraying off the dining chairs and the underside of the table (you know they are splattered with concrete splotches of past meals). They love to be given independent tasks a little farther away from mama- something they can do "all by myself." And when your visitors arrive, be sure to praise him, "Little Joe washed the chairs and table for you all by himself to get ready for your visit!"
3-4's. Are learning shapes and love to fold the wash/face cloths and napkins. It can sometimes turn into origami (smile). They are getting pretty good with the dustpan and can actually follow you around while you sweep, picking up your piles. Love to sort silverware- and will put away all their plastic dishes if you can find a low cabinet or drawer to keep them in. Love to wash mirrors and windows and some are past trying to drink from the spray bottle, so you may want to put a tiny bit of vinegar into the water as the cleaning solution (this should also convince the last stubborn drinker to cease and desist). Developmentally these kids are starting to figure out family roles- roleplaying is huge in this age group. They are happy when they know they have a useful place in the family, and they are doing jobs that lighten your load.
5-7's. Can expand the damp washcloth bit into dusting furniture. They can now put away almost all of the clean dishes (mine would leave dishes that needed to go in a high cabinet on the countertop and ask for help from "long arms"). They can learn to fold all their own clothing and put it away-- a trick we use is those 99c clear plastic shoeboxes (no lids) which are just about the right size for clothing up to about size 8 to 10. My littles each have 6 boxes- one each for socks/tights, unders, shirts, pants, sweaters/sweatshirts, and cute outfits that should stay together. You know, "go get a cute outfit on, we're going out." This age is very into sorting and ordering, and autonomy. This helps them keep order and autonomy in the clothing, because the boxes keep everything very neat. They can carry the empty box down to where the clothes are folded, and put their shirts in the shirt box, then carry the shirt box and put it away-- they fit neatly into drawers, usually, or into a shoe organizer hanging in the closet. Likes chore charts with pictures and stickers, it fits the sorting and ordering in their heads.7-9's. These guys are into Law & Order. They want to make sure chores are fair. They don't want any "Baby Jobs" but will supervise younger sibs and teach them how to do Baby Jobs. These guys like Chore Cards that can be dealt out to all sibs evenly, or posted rotating Chore Wheels or Schedules. Seem to be perfectly happy doing their share, as long as everyone else is sharing equally. They want to keep everything and have a hard time keeping their room clean because every little bit of trash is important to them-- it's important to instill some personal boundaries so they don't end up on HGTV's Clean Sweep. This can be done by giving them a Clean Sweep- type clean up system for their room: 3 cans- trash, giveaway/garage sale, and absolutely must keep. I let mine have a large Rubbermaid storage box for keeping treasures-in the garage loft.
9-12's. These kids can clean the bathroom, do their own laundry, do the dishes, make simple meals using boxes with instructions or simple recipes. They can earn a little money doing odd jobs for neighbors and like to use that money to provide gifts for loved ones. They can be bossy and want to hen-peck younger siblings, while being very nurturing towards them too. This is especially true for readers-- the books for this age group often feature kids who are keeping house on their own. Laura and Mary who keep house when Ma & Pa are stuck in town during a snowstorm; Farmer Boy and his siblings who are left home alone for 5 days; Boxcar Children...some bigger kids will be happy mowing and weed-eating, but many will think they are too small or be happier indoors doing housework.
12-15's. Again, think to the heroes of their books-- these kids are out doing adventures, no longer keeping house for young waifs. The heroes of the Narnia series, for instance, or Series of Unfortunate Events. They *can* keep house- they know how to do it and are capable. They just don't want to, their minds are on adventures. They are old enough to have hobbies and interests and want money - so it's easy to motivate them by offering paying work. It's important, though, to maintain the expectation that a family is a bit like communal living and everyone has a part to play to keep it running happily.
16+. This group are fairly willing workers and do a very thorough job. They have their minds set on being quite grown up and aiming to move out-- and are ready to prove it to you. So they will take on most household tasks with excellence. They can be capable foremen, leading younger siblings. And frankly, in my opinion, kids this age should have paying work outside the home and saving most of their earnings. However, at this age, they should be taking on more financial responsibility too-- my 16yo son paid for his football gear (I paid the registration fees). He does not have a driver's license but he paid the fee for the learner permit. He pays me (for time as well as gas) for my driving services over 200 miles a month. He pays for the trendy clothes he "has to have" above the family clothing allowance set for him. And he pays for his own evenings out-- these responsibilities cause him to lean towards being a careful consumer, too- bonus.
