Who homeschools?

USA Today reports a shift in homeschooling trends. Read the article here. What USA Today finds notable is not only the overall increase in homeschooling students, but the increase in the ratio of girls to boys. The author hypothesizes this shift could come from parents being fed up with "mean girls." Finally USA Today notes that homeschoolers are increasingly white and wealthy, and educated. Is the implication a privilege gap?

It's true, my immediate circle of homeschooling friends includes a number of well educated, white people who are reasonably well-off. Mostly, as homeschoolers are usually single-income families, they are usually frugal families making do with very little. Homeschoolers also tend to be running their households on such limited budgets yet a larger family size, thus decreasing the "per capita" income. In addition, homeschoolers receive no funding for homeschooling despite paying thousands every year in taxes that support the public school; the net result is poorer families, not richer. Despite the lower standard of living for many homeschool families, almost any will tell you that they reap benefits --better family relationships, kids with incredible learning opportunities and achievements, and even financial betterment. This leads me to wonder- what barriers are there to moderately- or under-educated people of various colors who are not earning more than $60,000 a year (the figure USA Today cites)? From discussions I've had with individuals over the years, the reasons I'm most often given for not homeschooling are

• the family needs two incomes [to keep at that $60,000 or above level]
  
• the parents can't see themselves spending THAT much time with their kids
• the parents don't feel capable of providing a rich education
• the family believes in the ideal of a state education normalizing a population by way of controlling socialization and indoctrination.
  

Because USA Today is not necessarily considered a credible source of information, I googled "US Dept of Education homeschool report" and downloaded the PDF straight from the source. In 1999, about 850,000 students self-reported to be homeschooled; in 2007 that number was 1.5 million, according to this estimate-- but their numbers could be significantly off. The US DOE says, "another similar sample survey might produce a different estimate." The figures for this report have been taken from "Interviews... conducted with the parents of 10,681 students, including 290 homeschooled students." There is no mention of how the interview candidates were chosen, where they came from, or why 290 homeschooled students out of 10, 681 students. There is an admittance that homeschool families may be less likely to respond to a government telephone interview. However, the figures are considered 95% accurate.

Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say

When I listen to Bible teachers on parenting, I get peeved, I admit, when discipline is used as a synonym for spanking. Thankfully, there are a number of Bible teachers who use the word properly. Some advocate spanking and are very careful to never use the word when they mean "spank." Or those who don't advocate spanking but are adamant to explain that "discipline" does NOT mean "spanking" and then teach about discipline in the true sense of the word- to disciple.

My favorite parenting books:

If you strike them, they will not die. Strike them, and spare their souls.

I used to spank, but apparently I was a very bad parent because my results were the opposite of what is claimed by Tedd Tripp and other Bible teachers is the "peaceable fruit of righteousness." I followed the advice/teaching of these biblical leaders when I performed spankings on my kids- without emotion, matter-of-fact, informing the child of the sin, performing the swat, then restoring the child to fellowship; every time, without delay; consistently.

This led to much conflict in my head, my heart and in my house.

I felt horrified at continuing to spank since it clearly gave me the wrong results. I felt horrified not to spank because all the church leaders teach that it's a sin not to spank your kids. "If you love your child you will chastise them promptly."

Then I read Clay Clarkson's book Heartfelt Discipline. He has a chapter explaining the original text and how it was interpreted to mean spanking children. He points out that yes, the verses do say to hit upon the back or buttocks with a rod-like instrument. His argument however is over the word being translated "child." This "child" is, by all other uses of the word in the Bible, at least 8 years old and into young adulthood. And the one being hit with the rod is a "fool" who despises teaching and wisdom and openly rebels.

My conviction is that there is no Biblical, moral, or intelligent reason to strike a child under the age of 8. And children between the ages of 8 and 18 must be treated carefully, in a Christ-like way- with honor and grace. In cases of severe foolishness or rebellion, there is definitely a place for serious consequences--- but in our culture, beating is unacceptable. Like blood sacrifice and stoning. Those are in the Bible but no one would consider them alternatives today.

So I don't spank and will not. But I choose it from conviction and have to willfully remind myself that it's not an option. I admit I am tempted to; years of conditioning are hard to overcome.

Sometimes I feel helpless to deal with my kids because I can't beat them, but the Holy Spirit reminds me that beating wouldn't work anyway and there are better responses-- such as prayer and fasting, and fellowship and grace and love.

What is Urban Sustainable Living?

Religion is Not About God

If religion is not about God, then what on earth is it about (for heaven's sake)? It is about us. It is about manipulating our brains so that we might think, feel, and act in ways that are good for us, both individually and collectively. Religious traditions work like the bow of a violin, playing upon the strings of human nature to produce harmonious relations between individuals and their social and physical environments.

Introduction, Religion is Not About God by Loyal Rue, Rutgers University Press, 2005.



Discuss.

Update: 5/15. Wow. 2 comments. I go away for a few weeks, and everyone stops reading? It was just a Mother's Day break, people! And yes, the whole Mother's Day thing almost broke me. The few of you who read are on my FB so I won't re-hash it out here. If you aren't on my FB, go over there if you want to see why my brain came home numb so I pulled up something I'd typed into my Drafts a few weeks ago and posted it yesterday just to get the ball rolling again.

This quote, this Intro from an atheist's book, summarizes (to me) the sum total of the misunderstanding most people have about following Christ. It was an issue in the time of the Patriarchs. It was an issue in the time of The Twelve. It was an issue to Augustine, Luther, Edwards, and it's an issue today. If I were the type to write a book, I'd title it something similar- maybe, God is not about Religion.

This is what we have to remember when we're dealing with people. This is what excites me about listening to Mark Driscoll at Mars Hill- for the first time in my life I'm getting a really good handle on something that has tripped me up all my life. I'm repenting of my religiosity at the same time as my rebellion.