Homeschooling is your JOB. Keep it, work it, 9 to 3. Hold it sacred.

Make your kids do their assignments, Teach them their lessons, Don't do anything else during school time, Don't even answer your phone.

Maybe that works for your homeschool, but that doesn't mean it has to be that way for every homeschool.

I didn't "sign up" for homeschooling to teach my child, to agree to give them an equivalent or superior education. And I don't think "teach them their lessons" is very high on my "to do" list at all, and won't really ever be.

My homeschool looks different from yours, but that doesn't make it wrong.

To me, the extra activities ARE the important lessons for my children. What they get from books is used for things they can't possibly get in real life and/or to reinforce what they've seen and experienced.


Do the reading, writing and math lessons daily. There is no reason to skip it.

One reason-- I don't believe in it.

I've only done reading, math and writing every day for two children, my oldest two, and if I'm honest I'll tell you it was never consistently everyday for them for long, because something ALWAYS came up to interrupt it. THEN I'd feel like a failure because "I couldn't get it all done."

Amazingly since I stopped trying to live up to the outside "expert" expectations, my kids learn better, learn more, and learn faster and there is no pressure on me.

If "school at home" works for you, more power to you.

But it doesn't mean it's the right way. Or the only way. And there are plenty of moms out there who will feel despondent from being held to those standards.

If I worked full time during the day and came home at 4 and had to do all the housework, cleaning, shopping, kids' appointments, and extracurriculars between 4 and 8 every evening, I'd be absolutely frantic.

I homeschool because there is no way I'm holding myself to THAT standard. It's not the only way and it's wrong to tell moms it is.

Almost no child "needs" sit down lessons, academic stuff, before age 10 or 12. What they *need* is quality books and materials to explore, a parent who reads aloud to them from a wide range of fiction, non-fiction, biography. They need time to be kids. They need plenty of fresh air and sunshine, good food that they prepare themselves, and housework to learn to work as a team to better their environment for others' benefit, not just their own.

And yes, it's a taste of heaven. Watching the Creative aspect of God come out in your children. Watching the Dominion aspect of God come out in your children. Watching them explore and conquer the world around them. At their pace. It's a taste of heaven. They bring me coffee now, they bring me books. They come and ask if they can clean the bathroom. They make posters and charts on things they study. They teach each other-- oh how sweet it is to see them work together!

I believe journals are important, too. So I bought one and wrote to my DD and she wrote me back. Then I wrote her again and she wrote me back. Now she writes to cousins, grandparents, and they write back. My kids also "journal" on the forums  and blogs as I do.

There is more than one way to express oneself. Some moms need to be creative and find what draws personal expression out of their children naturally rather than making an issue out of something that simply doesn't need to be an issue. Pencils on white paper are not the only way. It's not worth fighting with a child to put them in a mold... rather, you want to keep your child malleable so that he keeps making room for you.

My teen also drives me crazy when he wants to do things his own way -- I also considered military school at one point when he was very openly and angrily rebellious. I would have loved to have dumped my problem on them and given myself a breather. But instead, we're still together daily. We talk about things. Deep things. Crazy things. Funny is, he's not rebellious anymore. He's still wanting to be his own kid, but he's not rebelling angrily against me anymore. He's working with me, transferring his childishness to manishness. He doesn't get all the work done that I assign him, but that's his problem. He'll be out when he's 18 in a couple years and he'll suffer the consequences or he'll learn. Sink or swim.

The fallacy is that kids must be taught to a Scope & Sequence.  Their education is their job. But the truth is that which is learned by someone who is engaged and interested is retained. That which is forced by rote or Scope & Sequence is mostly lost.

Learning should not be Work. It should be a natural extension of life. Not something that is turned off outside of 9 to 5. A learner will be learning all the time. It won't require textbooks, schedules, bells or whistles.

My kids are rarely bored. In fact I blogged last Friday about what they do when there is nothing. at. all. scheduled. Now they are outside my window giving each other spelling tests. It's their latest game. And they are all learning spelling rules. 10yo, 8yo, 5yo, 3yo.

If it comes up because the child NEEDS to know a particular concept like square roots to accomplish something he wants to do, or if it comes up in a game sometime and they want to win..... then they'll grasp an understanding in a fraction of the time with much less effort, and they'll remember it better for longer.

Many frustrations and difficulties between child and parent comes from parents pushing a concept on a child and he's just. not. getting it.  So the parent pushes harder. I didn't get Algebra when I took it at age 14. I didn't get it when I took it at community college the first time at age 18. But 9 months later when I took it again at age 19, and with a different teacher and tutor, one day it just went off for me like a lightbulb and I "got" it.... and got an A. There really ARE things for which some will never "get" it... I never "got" some things at all. And others just need to try it during a "sweet spot."

Putting something away now and bringing it back out in 6 months is a perfectly valid way to approach "hard" things.

Moms who are still learning about this homeschooling thing, as I was 10 years ago, deserve to hear all the sides to a story. They need to know that the standards certain homeschoolers are placing them under are arbitrary and according to one opinion, and that there are other opinions out there. Whose kids are turning out just as fine.

 No matter what YOU do for or with your children, they will make their own choices and mistakes. You cannot control them forever. Some people who raised their children doing all the "right things" according to the stricter sense have rebels in adulthood who "break their hearts." I also know children were raised very much in "freedom" that would horrify you who are quite focused and successful individuals. Of course I also know kids raised poorly who are thugs and kids who were raised like the Von Trapps who are now little Marias. The point is, KIDS ARE THEIR OWN PEOPLE AND YOU CAN'T DO A THING ABOUT IT BUT HOPE, PRAY, and actually GET TO KNOW THAT LITTLE PERSON AND ADDRESS HIS HEART.